18 February 2010

Good Day/Bad Day

Overall I'm happy with the balance between work and family that I've created by working part-time from home. Some days I feel very competent, like the "super-woman" that all moms feel they are supposed to be. Other days I'm not only sure I'm done having kids, but wondering if I'm capable of dealing with the ones I have.

Here is what a good day looks like:
I wake up before Audrey, grab a shower and some coffee. I play with Aaron, get Audrey up and feed her, have some breakfast and Kim arrives. I clean up the kitchen before starting work. Maybe even throw in a load of laundry. I get a lot of work done, remember to eat lunch before I get too hungry, and Kim gets both kids down for a nap before she leaves. Aaron sleeps until 4pm or later; Audrey naps at least 2 hours (this has only happened 3 times). I continue working while they nap and reach a good break point before Audrey wakes up. I play with Aaron and Audrey after their naps and then Aaron entertains Audrey and/or himself while I prepare dinner. Thom comes home just as dinner is ready. Dinner turns out really good and Thom has 3 helpings. Audrey goes to sleep easily (this has only happened a handful of times) and Aaron is pleasant at bedtime. Both kids are in bed by 8pm and Thom and I have some time to relax in front of the TV. All feels well with the world.

A bad day goes more l like this:
It's not a Kim day. A play date falls through. We find something to do last minute, but we get home late for naptime and Aaron stalls until he has a meltdown from being so tired. Audrey cries while I get Aaron ready for his nap. I'm starving because I forgot to pack a snack. If Audrey does go down for a nap before I get Aaron down, she wakes up as soon as he's down. Otherwise, she takes a short nap. On a really bad day, Aaron doesn't nap at all (very rare fortunately). I hardly get any work done and I'm so exhausted mentally from not having a long enough break from both kids that I have no dinner plan by the time Thom comes home and we end up fending for ourselves after we get Aaron to bed. I try to get Audrey to sleep before Aaron goes to bed, but she perks up every time she hears Aaron's voice, even though her bedroom door is closed. She is so over-tired from not taking any naps longer than 45 minutes that she starts crying inconsolably. Aaron melts down at bedtime and makes matters worse. Thom reads Aaron stories by himself because I'm still trying to get Audrey to bed. I finally get her to sleep after Aaron goes down, only for her to wake up crying while we're trying to eat a very late dinner. We take turns eating and consoling her and the house is finally quiet around 9pm. I'm exhausted and grumpy and resent that Thom gets to leave the house every day by himself.

2 comments:

eldertrag said...

well, you know at least that I understand. I used to go upstairs to our bedroom, close the door and cry. It does get better. Mom

Shannon said...

I remember those days... It seems like they will never end due to the exhaustion, but then you start to notice longer naps here and there, and solid sleep at night. Trying to coordinate naps is indeed a challenge. We still struggle with that. Some you win, some you lose! We just learn to pick the battles and move on. Our breakthroughs with sleep happened in the 7th month with Bridget, which couldn't come any sooner!